Farewell, Friend

This evening, we started saying goodbye to a good friend and an even better man. I’m angry, and I’m heartbroken for my husband, his coworkers, and most importantly for Ryan’s wife.

[see story from August about the green beret sniper http://krjkickstumorass.blogspot.com/2015/08/home.html]

I was relaying this story to Ryan’s wife recently, and she told me how excited he had been that I had written about what he said on my blog. She said that he had talked about it for weeks. I am honored that this had meant as much to him as it means to me.

This afternoon When we went through the visitation line, I said my goodbyes and told Ryan that I would continue being a badass for the both of us. Later, I was able to tell this story to some of the members of Ryan’s green beret team. 

Godspeed, friend.

Fight like Hell.

Neuro Ophthalmologist

The good news is that my vision is fine. The bad news is that we just have to keep waiting for my brain to heal. As we found out yesterday at the ophthalmologist, nerves for your eyes are on the surface of your brain, so if your brain is angry your eyes will be angry. I passed all of the vision tests. My eyes are just having difficulty dilating appropriately in certain light conditions. I also have eye fatigue because my brain is still in the process of healing.

That really puts a cramp in this bookworm’s reading plans. The books call to me from my night stand, “Read Me. Read Me,” but by bedtime, I’m just too tired. The ophthalmologist had me buy a pair of those cheap reading glasses to help my eyes when I do need to read screens or paper. As I'm finding though, the laptop sits just a little too far away for the glasses to be of any help. I'll have to test them with a book when I'm not too tired. When I am able to go back to work, I may need to move my monitor closer if I still need to use the reading glasses. 

As for everything else, we continue to wait until the MRI on the 30th, and I continue to rest and heal.

Fight like Hell.      

Same Old, Same Old

Nothing much has changed here. My eyes are slowly returning to normal, but I’m still having problems focusing in low light, on screens/books, and if something is back-lit.  I have a neuro ophthalmology appointment on Wednesday… But my oncologist has outlawed me from driving, indefinitely.

Boo. Hiss.

I don’t have an infusion this week, so I’m looking forward to not getting stabbed in the chest for another week. Though after the 2 cavities I had filled on Monday, I’d rather have my port accessed any day. [I'm So glad I had chemo last time, since it likely did nothing but make me vomit and destroy my enamel].

The radiation fatigue is still holding on pretty strongly. I need at least one nap every day to function. The kitties have really been enjoying the naps, since they get to cuddle on the couch with me.

N. had to shave my head again tonight. I had this crazy Friar Tuck look going on. I’d say 80% of my head is bald or balding. My sister also had to wax the sides of my face today. I’m pretty furry anyway – Germany & the Czech Republic should really give the women in my family a hair removal stipend – and then the devil steroids made my hair grow like crazy. Fun.

Fight like hell.